Retrieving memories
by saiki518kuu
Summary: Allen returns from a mission where road erased his memories of ever joining the order. How will his friends react when they find out not only does he not remember who they are but he also seems to be mute. YULLEN
1. Chapter 1

"K…kanda

"K…kanda?"

"….."

"Kanda?"

"……"

"YUU-CHAN?!"

"DON'T CALL ME BY MY FIRST NAME!!"

"Well we know he is in there"

The red haired exorcist sat out side of the samurai's room with linali while they tried to get kanda to leave and come see Allen for he just got back from his mission. "What the hell do you want!?" the samurai busted through the door "accidentally" hitting lavi in the face. Kanda look around the door "w…WHAT THE HELL YUU?!" lavi exclaimed as he started nursing his now broken nose. "What?" the taller man asked as he closed his door and started walking away, "what?...What?! You just broke my nose! That's what! why did you open your door like that?" the red head caught up to him leaving linali behind. "che, so? …why the did you want me out of my room so bad I was meditating." You could clearly see how pissed off kanda was because his eye was slightly twitching. He did not have time for this he still had to train and-"komui nii-san wants all four of us on a mission." Linali said catching up to the two male exorcists this broke the samurai's train of thought. _All four?_

Kanda ponder who the fourth member would be and then it hit him '_great I have an over emotional chick, a baka usagi, and a bean sprout on my team' _he said mentally while walking into komui's office and stopped dead in his tracks making lavi run straight into his back. Lavi who was still nursing a broken nose winced in pain "what the hel-" he too stopped dead in his tracks and gasped. Linali just stared at the two boys who had shock plaster all over their faces. Komui was not only dead serious but he was working too.

'_Holy shit it's the end of the world!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!'_

'_Wow that's new.'_

'_Wow something must be wrong for nii-san to actually work'_

the three of them then noticed that there was another presence in the room and turn to see none other then Allen walker. _What's up with moyashi he looks like he's gone through hell…wait what the hell do I care?! _Linali cleared her throat once again breaking kanda's train of thought, "well Allen-kun how was your mission?" she said taking a seat next to Allen. Allen just stared at her as kanda and lavi took a seat on other side of the younger boy. "Allen?" lavi asked wondering why the boy was acting so strange, "Allen-kun got into and accident on his last mission" komui said finally looking up from his work. "a...an accident?! But he looks fine to me" lavi said studying the boy who just sat and stared at the wall behind komui. "He may not have any physical injuries but it seems that he has lost his ability to speak and we believe he has lost all memories of ever entering the order" komui had a very serious face as he spoke in a grim tone. Lavi gasped as linali cover her mouth with one hand trying to hold back a sob while kanda just stood there with shock on his face. All three then turned to look at Allen hoping that it was not true, "Allen-kun the one with read hair is lavi, the girl is my sister linali and the one with the scowl is kanda" komui explained sadness apparent in his eyes. Allen glanced at the three around him, then turned to look at komui and nodded dimly. "Komui san do you know what caused this" lavi questioned as he looked away from Allen "um yes Tim has a recording of it um its pretty brutal" he said as he gave Tim to lavi. Tim's mouth opened and he was staring at a holographic Allen.

_Flash back_

"_Tim you have to take the innocence to headquarters" Allen handed the innocence to Tim and then turned to face the unknown opponent._

"_Allen walkers you are an important part of the earls plan do not resist" a tall man with his hair slicked back wearing a top hat spoke calmly._

"_You honestly think I will go with you?" Allen spoke calmly while he sent Tim flying but Tim just flew into a tree to record what was going on. Allen invocated his innocence and charged. _

"_I was hoping you would… road?" he called as a small girl hopped down next to the tall man then jumped forward punching a hole in Allen's stomach._

"_GAH?!" blood poured from his mouth "sorry Allen-kun I have to erase what you know cause it will be easier to take you to earl-sama" road reached up to Allen's head but Allen jumped back a few feet and started attack when the man from before appeared behind him putting his hand through his back grabbing his heart. _

"_Move and I will tear your heart from your body" _

"_Thanks tyki" the small girl jumped forward and put her hand on his head._

"_Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!" Allen thrashed and the man known as tyki pulled his hand out as soon as he went limp. Road sliced a gash across his letting him fall to the ground. _

"_was that necessary?" tyki asked as she walked over to where he was. "Well what would they do if he had only one wound through the stomach after fighting a noah? Its unnatural cause we usually take their innocence and kill them" road explained "good thinking" tyki agreed as they vanished. _

"_WALKER-SAN?!" one of the finders called noticing the boy lying in a puddle of his own blood. "He will bleed to death if we don't do anything!! His wounds are too deep! Call headquarters immediately!!" there were three finders all shouting commands at each other as Allen slowly bled to death._

_End of flash back thingy_

Linali was sobbing as lavi started to shake. "That does not explain why he can't speak" kanda spoke keeping his usual pissy face in hold. "We believe that the shock of forgetting and not knowing anyone caused he should start speaking soon." Komui explained "why?" lavi spoke up, his voice shaking. "Why what?" komui asked "why ...d...does

The earl want Allen?" he asked as he shook violently. "we are not sure yet."

" you guys do realize Allen is sitting right here?" kanda stated sounding more pissed than he normally is. Linali made a small gasp as lavi turned to the boy, the boy was shaking and he had tears in his eyes. Lavi went to hug him but Allen immediately jumped off the couch. Lavi had hurt written on his face. "he wont let people touch him" komui stated, "s…so nii-san ..W…what was our mission?" linali finally spoke. "You can't send him on a mission" kanda and lavi both exclaimed at the same time. "I'm not I am giving you three the mission of watching over him since you three were his closest friends." Lavi calmed down at hearing this but kanda just got more pissed. "fuck that send me on an actual mission!!" kanda snapped, "KANDA!" komui yelled startling " you will not go on any missions until Allen either remembers or can at least speak!!" kanda reach the highest level of pissed lavi has ever seen. "WHAT!? You are not gonna send me on missions so I can baby sit some brat that can't take care of himself?!" kanda snapped as he heard a sniffle from behind. He turned and saw tears running down Allen's face.

'_shit'_

lavi was about to turn and snap at kanda when….

_**SLAP!!**_

Linali slapped kanda across the face, "how can you be so selfish after all Allen did for the order and how nice he was to you even when you clearly tried to push him away and when he needs you your gonna complain about it after all Allen did for all of us always smiling we can pay him back by helping him now when he is in need!!" linali started crying as both lavi and kanda stared at her shocked. "Linali is right we can pay him back for helping us." Lavi agreed grinning at Allen; "tch" kanda got up and walked away. "Kanda Allen will be staying in your room" and another argument started.

"why he has his own damn room" kanda snapped once again.

"he cant stay in his room because it was destroyed a few days ago by komirin x" linali explained.

"Then he can stay in one of your guys room"

"Um I am a girl and lavi shares a room with bookman" linali stated

Kanda looked back at the boy who had stop crying.

…._shit…_

"Ok moyashi here is the deal…" kanda opened the door to his room and shut It as soon as the boy walked in. "you are sleeping on the couch and so help me god if you bug me while I am meditating you will lose your head" kanda warned as Allen walked over to the couch and sat down . Allen just sat there not responding to anything kanda said and this pissed kanda off. _The least he could do was nod or something it's like he is fucking brain dead. "_Are you brain dead or something?!" kanda snapped and Allen just looked at him, "god what a bother" kanda went over to his bed to lie down. "Tomorrow you are coming to train with me because the sooner you get better the sooner you can leave me the hell alone." And with that the lights went off and the fell asleep.

_mmm….soft…and warm…wait a minute_

Kanda through back the covers to reveal a certain white haired boy sleeping, arms tightly wrapped around kanda's waist._ What. The. Fuck. HOW THE HELL DID THAT HAPPEN?? _Kanda's mind was whirling as the cursed boy started to stir. Allen's eyes opened up and he looked up at kanda smiling a bit. That was the expression he made ever since he got back from his mission. "What the fuck are you doing in my bed moyashi?" Kanda asked through gritted teeth trying not to scare the boy. Allen had sadness in his eyes for a split second but quickly covered it up but kanda did not miss the look. "What did you have a nightmare or something?" kanda asked not believing it the boy just looked up and nodded a little. _Are you fucking serious?! What is he five?!_

Linali lavi and komui all gasped and then tried to hold in their giggles. Allen was latching on to kanda's arm as if he would spontaneously combust if he let go and kanda just glared at everyone who dares to look or a laugh at him. His hand was twitching, about to grab mugen and slice up every on in the dinning hall. "ALLEN!! Sweetie what would you like to eat" the very gay looking cook asked, and Allen looked up at kanda. "He wants 50 matarashi dango, 40 bowls of soba, 10 plates of tempera, 3 bowls of miso soup, and …." Allen gripped at kanda's side shaking his head. He held up one finger, "what you only want one bowl of soup?!" kanda asked in disbelief. Allen nodded. "Ok he wants one bowl of soup and I will have some soba noodles." Jerry practily fell over and murmured right away and walked back to the kitchen.

Kanda grabbed their food at sat down across from lavi and linali who were staring at Allen with wide eyes. "where is allen and who the fuck are you!?" lave exclaimed pointing an acussing finger at the small boy now cowering behind kanda. "shut the hell up baka usagi if he is not hungry then he isn't hungry leave him alone." Linali just stared. "did you just defend him?" she asked in disbelief, lavi went from staring at allens plate that was lacking food to kanda's face. "Holy shit what the hell is going on?!" lavi was pulling at his hair. "Like I said shut up the stupid moyashi won't let go of my arm and komui said to be….n…ni…nic..." kanda hated that word that damn word. "Nice?" linali offered, kanda twitched, "yeah". "So Allen has taking a like to yu-chan eh?" lavi questioned rubbing his chin. "Well Allen you like yuu Chan don't you?" Allen nodded slowly, lavi cracked up and linali tried to hold in her laughs when…

"WONDERFUL!!"

Komui popped up making Allen grip tighter to kanda and hide his face in his arm.

"How the hell is it wonderful?!" kanda snapped he was hoping komui would leave him alone today. "well Allen would not make ANY contact with any of the finders like when one of the tried to change his bandages he lashed out and broke several plate and a lamp." Komui explained, "What did you do to make him trust you?" komui asked after much thought. "Nothing I woke up he was in my bed and he would not let go after that" the ravened hair exorcist explain….

"WHAT?!" Linali and lavi both jumped up knocking their chairs over,

"I said I woke up and…."

"WE HEARD YOU!!" Linali was furious…kanda could guess why

_bitch needs to back of my moyashi…WHAT THE FUCK I DID NOT JUST THINK THAT…that's right that was not me twas someone else _kanda mentally reassured himself.

"Yuu-chan how dare you take away Allen's innocence at age 15 you horrid old pervert!"

"What did you call me!!" kanda got up unsheathing mugen. "You heard me!" and that was the last they saw of lavi for he bolted out the door and down the hallway to his room were he barricaded the door.

The three exorcists stared at the door way until they heard the sound of a dish hitting the table. There sat Allen eyes wide as he shook in fear at the now only one shouting man.

* * *

sorry its a cliffy i will update if i get some reviews


	2. do i know her?

* * *

sorry this chapter is so short i am starting school tomarrow so i dont have alot of time but i will update again soon. thank you all for reading!!

* * *

The small boy hid from kanda for the rest of the day but when it became nightfall allen had to go back to kanda's room to slee

The small boy hid from kanda for the rest of the day but when it became nightfall Allen had to go back to kanda's room to sleep, so he slowly opened the door and tiptoed in only to find kanda passed out on the couch clearly waiting for allen. Allen sighed as he put a cover over kanda and went to sleep on the floor because he was afraid of getting yelled at by the older man tomorrow for sleeping in his bed.

Kanda opened his eyes slowly only to notice that he fell asleep on the couch, he look around the room noticing the small boy curled up on the floor.

'_Why the hell didn't he sleep on the bed?'_

As kanda pondered this he failed to notice that Allen was stirring. The white haired exorcist opened his eyes slowly as if waiting to be yelled at, seeing that was not going to happen he sat up and stretched, his back did not go well with sleeping on the floor. Kanda then got up and walked over to the younger exorcist, kneeling beside him he put a hand on Allen's shoulder. The small boy jumped at the contact, "where the hell were you yesterday?" kanda asked quietly, the older man was beginning to get a soft spot for him. Allen turned his head slowly to face the raven haired man, he stared up tears in his eyes, "k…k…ka...kan...Kand" he stuttered out while wrapping his arms around the older boy. That was first thing he said after he got back from that damn mission, and it was kanda's name.

Taken aback when the boy hugged him kanda just put his arms around him.

"Alright moyashi c'mon lets got get breakfast"

Allen's been eating more and more every day, but he can still only say kanda's name and even then he does not say it above a whisper. The older exorcist had grown very attached to the small white haired boy that constantly clung to his side, but he would never admit it. Whenever the bookman apprentice pointed the two's relationship out kanda would threaten him with mugen then stomp away all the while with Allen still attached to his arm, you would never see one with out the other nowadays.

"Hey yu-chan I have a question for you and allen-Chan!" the idiotic red head decided to ask as the three sat down to eat lunch.

"Don't call me that." Kanda tried to remain cool fearing that he would scare the white haired boy sitting next to him, anger apparent in his voice.

"Well what ever, so about my question..." lavi continued brushing off kanda's cruel glare.

"what?!" kanda was starting to get annoy dreading the oncoming question.

"well…since you and Allen are always attached I was wondering, do you two take showers together?" lavi calmly asked, grinning with an evil glint in his eye.

Kanda spit out the food he was chewing and Allen began to choke on his chicken, startling lavi as he reached over to pat Allen on the back. The child spit out the chicken into a napkin glaring at the red head.

"Lavi?" kanda asked coolly, turning to the red head with a murderous intent surrounding him.

"Hmm?" lavi questioned, backing away slowly.

"WHAT IN GODS NAME GAVE YOU THAT IDEA?!" kanda stood up abruptly, whacking the red head over the head.

Allen suddenly coughed getting the two older boys attentions; he then stood up and strode over to where the two boys were standing. He paused and smiled a bit but not like the normal soft smile, no this was the smile Allen would give his opponent in playing poker. The boy was extremely pissed off which was very uncommon and both boys froze fearing what the silent boy was about to do. The white haired boy walked straight up to lavi and kicked him where it hurts the most and simply stalked away. Normally this would be fine but seeing as Allen did not go anywhere with out kanda it alarmed him as he left lavi to writher in pain on the ground to follow the smaller boy around the corner. Finally spotting the boy as he came closer he noticed a slight tinge of pink cover the boys cheeks, seeing this he chuckled and left the boy alone for a while.

Once Allen finally decided to show himself kanda was currently trying to read a book with an energetic red head chattering away. Allen coughed lightly once again getting the two exorcist attention; lavi tensed, a hand instantly going to protect his groin. Allen blushed and quickly moved his lips; "Sorry" kanda translated for him, looking utterly bored. Kanda put his book down figuring he would not be able to read anytime soon, "eh um its okay Allen" lavi put one hand behind his head and grinned. "I deserved it, um I would love to stay and chat but komui asked me to come and chat so bye" lavi left quickly leaving Allen with a hurt expression on his features. Kanda noticed this, "don't worry he will be fine eventually and komui actually did ask to speak with him, moyashi-" kanda was interrupted by Allen's stomach growling loudly. Kanda sigh and stood up leading allen to the cafeteria, "c'mon moyashi" he spoke as he grabbed Allen's wrist.

The two just got their food when…

"kanda-kun, komui-nisan would like to speak to you" linalee walked into the cafeteria to find Allen attached to kanda like always.

"Oh and allen-san too." She added; Allen did not like linalee so he would avoid her and always hide behind kanda, all the while kanda just let the boy cower behind him because the older teen did not like the way the Asian girl looked at Allen. She looked at him as if he was a piece of meat and it pissed kanda off because Allen never noticed. Kanda himself would never admit it but he was extremely protective over allen, lavi got the message and just talked to allen and kanda like friends but linalee on the other hand would look at allen with desire, both lavi and kanda noticed and never let him be near her alone because in his state she could do anything to take advantage of the small white haired exorcist.

"What for?" kanda got pissed off every time he saw her even glance at his moyashi.

"He is sending you, lavi and allen on a mission to England." She stated noticing the murderous aura around kanda; she didn't get it, why does he hate her so much all of a sudden?

"Allen is going?" kanda asked in disbelief, the boy still could only say his name and would only let kanda touch him.

"It's an easy mission so it's just like training" linalee explained as she led them to komui.

_I guess it's a good idea if there are not too many akuma'_ kanda agreed to komui's plan mentally

The three walked in to find lavi already taking up a seat on the couch, the red head gave one of his goofy smiles to kanda and Allen as they walked in. "I see you too are as close as ever." Lavi snickered, "shut up baka usagi" kanda snapped back and Allen just smiled at lavi, to Allen lavi was like an older brother and he would sometimes hold lavi's hand or pull on his sleeve instead of kanda's. Komui sat at his desk holding three folders and he began to explain the mission, "I was originally just going to send you and lavi because it is just a small mission but allen seems to only like you two and kanda is the only one who can understand him when he wants something so I am sending him with you." He handed them the three folders as he continued to explain the mission. "You just have to go retrieve the innocence that the finders have obtained there should not be any obstacles so it is fairly easy, you three can stay there for a few days if you like for some time off" hearing this lavi's face brightened, allen smiled the same soft smile he always does, and kanda just wore the same scowl as always mumbling something about it being a waste of time. And with that three boarded the train and were on their way to England, but kanda for some reason had a bad feeling about this mission. He merely brushed the feeling away and continued to stare out the window of the train.

The white haired boy stared at the passing trees and villages the sun illuminating his pale white face. They have been on this train for about six hours already and still had about two to go. The small boy leaned on the window while one of his hands rested in his lap the other gripped tightly around the sleeve of the older samurai's shirt. Across from him sat the goofy redhead who was currently playing around with Tim, and next to Allen sat the cold hearted kanda yuu who was currently reading a book with on arm being held captive by the small boy occupying the seat next to him. Something outside of the window caught Allen's attention he slowly gripped kanda's sleeve tighter getting the older mans attention. He pointed out the window towards a girl. The girl had spiky black hair and was carrying an umbrella over her shoulder; she looked oddly familiar so Allen tried to get kanda's attention as if asking 'do I know her?' But by the time kanda pulled out of his book the train had passed her up and she was gone. "What is it moyashi I am trying to read" kanda scowled making Allen let go of his sleeve for a moment until his hand took its place back on his sleeve. Allen shook his head as if to say 'never mind' , he rested his head against the window and closed his eyes drifting off to sleep, the last image in his mind of that girl smiling a wicked cruel smile speaking the words "the actors have arrived let the show begin."

* * *

sai: again sorry it is soo short i will update soon. please review!!

lavi: review or i will molest allen in his sleep!!

kanda: like hell you will!! points mugen in face

allen: sweat drop

sai: um no he won't...


	3. death alone can be very painful

Sai: thank you all for reviewing

Sai: thank you all for reviewing!! bows head

Lavi: awww I didn't get to molest Allen.

Allen: you weren't gonna!!

Sai: um…ok well I am sooo sorry I have not updated in a while because I just started school last week and I have not had a lot of time…I just started high school an I was kinda overwhelmed with paper work.

Allen: lavi stop touching me!!

Lavi: pokes Allen and chases him around the room no!

Kanda: wtf?!

Sai: well um sorry again…I…

Allen: …don't…

Lavi: ….own….

Kanda: d gray man. If she did I would be in a dress…thank god she doesn't own us!

* * *

"Allen?"

"Allen." The white haired boy felt a hand on his shoulder, shaking him.

"Allen!" he rolled over trying to block out the voice calling him.

"OI BAKA MOYASHI GET THE HELL UP!!" Allen sat up with a start, hitting his head against lavi's. "K...Kanda?" he mumbled as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.

"Allen, its time to get off the train." Lavi informed the small boy as he grabbed his own suitcase along with Allen's. Allen stood up wobbled a bit and the stumbled over his feet to landing on his ass. He groaned and tried to stand up again this time bumping into a wall. Kanda sighed, picking up the smaller boy he put his hand under his knees and the other tightly around his shoulders; he grabbed his bag and walked out pf the room.

"Kanda…" Allen's voice trailed off as he fell asleep once again in kanda's arms.

Kanda glanced down his usual bored expression faltered as he did so, 'damn moyashi cant even walk on his own' the older teen quickly turned his head away pushing the feeling aside.

The group arrived at their hotel Allen still fast asleep in kanda's arms, lavi ended up carrying all the bags with their finder Joey. Kanda gently placed Allen down on the couch in there room, the small boy still sleeping. Kanda kneeled down placing his hand gently against the boy's cheek; he bowed his head almost touching his lips to the younger boy's until he stirred. Kanda jumped back in surprise, _'what the hell am I doing?!' _he got up and left the room quickly a blush threatening to creep across his face.

The small boy sat up as soon as he heard the door close, he ended up waking up as soon as kanda placed him on the couch. He was startled to find the older teens face so close to him, his face turned a deep shade of red, _'what was that?'_ The small boy stood up wobbling a bit then he walked out the door quietly closing the door behind him.

"Kanda?" a small sleep filled voice came from the entrance of the lobby.

"Bout time you woke up moyashi" the older teen threw a mission packet at him, allen caught it opening it.

His lips moved forming the words 'when do we start?' kanda quickly caught this grateful that he can read lips.

"as soon as lavi comes-" just then the red head leapt down the stairs, "ready to go!?" he exclaimed.

"Sure" was his one and only reply, Allen left his vision wander on the large room. In the corner of His eye he caught a shadow in the other room, he turned to see what it was but there was nothing there. He rubbed his eyes a bit and the quickly fallowed after the two older teens.

* * *

Smoke filled the air as the boy shot at another akuma, he heard his friends as they killed numbers of them. This task was easy for the boy even though the first sight of them scared him half to death.

Kanda finished off the rest near him looking around to see lavi and allen were both finished. They currently obtained the innocence and were attacked by a few one level akuma.

"Oi are you finished? We can leave tomorrow then" the taller boy sheathed mugen; the other two came to stand next to the raven haired man.

"Gotcha! See that was not too hard Allen was it?" Allen shook his in a side to side motion, he grasped kanda's sleeve in his hand. This action made kanda want to smile, the boy could only say his name still and he only let himself and lavi touch him.

"Well done exorcists." A calm voice broke through the silence, stepping out of the darkness was none other than Tyki Mikk. The three exorcists tensed as lavi and kanda pulled out there innocence, Allen on the other hand stood there in complete shock. This man, a little red flag went up in his mind warning him of this man. Allen stepped back a few steps behind kanda, he was then sent flying.

"ALLEN!!" the small boy hit the ground with a light thud.

"Hello Allen" a childish voice spoke out from the darkness behind them, just then Tyki appeared in front of the white haired exorcist.

"Road that was unnecessary, lock the other two up so they can watch" tyki picked the younger teen up by his collar.

"Can do!" just as kanda was about to rush to the younger boy's aid he and lavi both were surrounded by darkness.

"Ahhahah!!" laughter filled the dark room, kanda and lavi glanced at each other.

"Sorry but we have to kill Allen he is a large threat to the earls plot!" road appeared behind the two teens.

"What?! No!! Let us out!!" lavi turned to punch Road square in the face only to hit air.

"Oh I will in about three-two-one" Road's voice faded away along with the darkness, revealing Allen once again.

Kanda could not think straight he stood there as lavi rushed forward holding the limp body in his arms. Tears fell from the red heads eye, kanda did not understand, _'why is that idiot crying? That baka moyashi would never die even if you wanted him too."_ Kanda stepped forward, kneeling down next to the sobbing rabbit, tears started to form in his eyes. The small boy's chest had a large hole ripped into his chest right above his heart, his blood soaked lavi as the older teen continued to hold the younger one. Kand put his hands on Allen's face looking into the small unresponsive eyes, he wasn't breathing, his heart stopped.

Kanda cried.

"ALLEN!!"

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Sai: SORRY!! I totally left it at a cliff hanger and its very short!!. Allen might come back if I get some reviews. Um i will update soon because I sprained my ankle so I can't really do anything else XD

Kanda: baka clutz

Lavi: that's not nice sai-chan has been working very hard to keep he grades up!

Kanda: so that was not why she sprained her ankle.

Sai: he's right I tripped T-T

Lavi: oh…points and laughs

Sai: T-T

Allen: hugs Sai

Sai: thank you Allen!! hugs back

Lavi: please review…


	4. savior

Sai: I am sooo sorry it must have killed most of you at that cliffy

Sai: I am sooo sorry it must have killed most of you at that cliffy!! It was also very short!! cries soooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyy!!

Kanda: what's up with her?

Lavi: she's in pain from her ankle.

Allen: nods

Sai:cries wahhhh!!

Allen and lavi: hugs Sai

Kanda: if you actually killed Allen I will ripped your head off…that might distract you from you ankle.

Sai: cowers you'll see

Lavi: sai-chan does not-

Kanda: own us…or d gray man…or I would be in a dress shivers

* * *

"ALLEN!!"

The rest of that night went by with a blur, Kanda hoping for this to be a dream or a cruel joke.

'No way can't he be!'

"I am so sorry-"

'_No'_

"Allen-san-"

'_No!'_

"Died during battle-"

'_NO!!'_

"We will burn his body tomorrow evening you all are dismissed" komui dismissed the group, linali was sobbing along with Johnny, lavi sat there dark circles were formed under his eyes…he looked like death himself. Kanda, kanda looked as if his entire world just died, he would never yell at any one who called him Yu and he would never eat. Lavi and kanda just went about there daily lives as if ghost. They both lost someone dear, lavi a little brother, and kanda, well he was not sure what Allen was to him.

The next morning the two 18 year old teens sat in the library reading books that had no importance to them whatsoever. That was until kanda was struck in the head by the golden snitch!! (I forgot about Tim…sorry! T-T) kanda snatched the thing up off of his head, Tim started to open up his mouth, a video of Allen started to play catching both of the teen's attentions instantly:

"_Kanda!!" the small boy reached out a hand but both of the boys were swallowed in darkness._

"_Well now that there out of the way…" tyki started as he threw down a dead body, Allen glanced at it and gasped. _

_The body was an exact replica of the younger teen, a hole punched through his chest, blood spilling from his mouth._

"_You are going to come with us." Allen invocated his innocence, only to be grabbed from behind and taken away just in time for lavi and kanda to spot the replica._

_Tyki hid in the trees with Allen in a tight hold. Allen watch as kanda and lavi both cried for the replica of him. Tears slipped down his face,_

"_kanda-" _

Tim shut his mouth, a sob escaped lavi's mouth. Kanda just continued to stare at the small golden blob, a tear streaked down his face.

'_He's alive'_

'_Alive'_

'_Thank you god'_

"Kanda…?" lavi stood up tear trails down his face.

"What?" he choked out, standing up letting Tim float up to rest on his head.

"We are go-"kanda interrupted.

"Absolutely" kanda and lavi both ran out the door straight to komui's office.

"WHAT?!" a coffee cup fell and shattered as kanda and lavi both explained what they saw from Tim.

"You two can't go alone"

"Yes we can, you can send more people later we are leaving now" kanda exclaimed as lavi and him were already half way out the door.

* * *

The wind rustled through the older teen's hair, it was currently dark out. The two just got off of the train and were now in Transylvania, this was supposed to be were the earl was currently staying.

As the two approached the rather large castle they hear a branch snap. They both pulled out their innocence they turned to where the sound was heard,

"Over hear"

Both of their heads snapped behind them, their stood road and tyki this time accompanied by Debitto and Jasdevo.

"Where is he?!" Kanda nearly screamed as he prepared to fight the three noah…

'_wait…three?' _Kanda whipped around,

"Wow you two are idiots."

Darkness surrounded the two.

* * *

His head stung, could instantly tell he was chained to something.

"Ugh-"

"Yu. Good you're up…." He noticed this to be lavi's voice; he turned his head only to see lavi tied up to a chair.

"What happened? Where are we?" The long haired teen questioned.

"I don't know but what I do know is that we have been locked up and some other person has been too because he has been screaming for the past hour." The red head replied, just as a loud pain filled cry filled the air.

"Who is that?!" kanda asked as he winced at the sobs and yells of the other person in the room. It sounded as if they were right next to him.

"Well now that you both are up I wanted to tell you that those yells that are coming from the room next to you are indeed Allen Walker's. Enjoy listening to his pain." Roads voice came from the intercom in the corner of the room, it then faded away.

"_AHHHHHHHHHH!!"_

Kanda winced.

"Shit!"

"_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! S...STOP!!"_

"Shit...Allen…"

* * *

"Well allen are you going to side with us?" tyki asked as he whipped the boy once more.

Allen shook his head.

"Tch fine by me" he cut a deep slash down Allen's small torso, thick liquid spilling out.

"Ahhh!!" they boy screamed as tyki continued to cut long slashes down his chest and legs.

"Tyki?" tyki turned his head to the entrance of the room, Road appeared looking slightly annoyed.

"Yes?" he smiled a bit.

"The earl said to kill him that either we don't have him on our side or he will be destroyed" Road replied, she looked sad, like she was a five year old who just got her favorite doll taken away.

"Kay" with one swift move he put a hole in Allen's stomach.

Allen's eyes widened, the pain was unbearable, as the crimson liquid spilled from his pale white lips.

"K…kanda…" darkness surrounded him.

* * *

After the hours of screaming past it was incredibly quiet, the quietness scared kanda. He did not know if Allen simply passed out or if he actually died, this scared him.

Kanda glanced at lavi, the poor red head had to sit and endure hearing his little brother be tortured, and tears filled his eyes.

"Yu?"

"What"

"I can't take it"

"I...i know"

Just as the words slipped from kanda's lips the door opened revealing Miranda and Krory.

"Kanda-kun!! Lavi-kun!! Hurry we have to go they know were here!!"

"NO!! we have to get allen!!" as soon as kanda was free he tore off out the door and he burst through the door next to him.

What he saw was burned into his mind were it would stay for as long as he lived. There on the far wall was allen chained up with a huge gaping hole in his stomach, blood was distributed all over the wall as if somebody painted it red but kanda knew better. Blood dripped down the sides of his mouth as his eyes stared into nothingness half opened.

"ALLEN!!"

Kanda lurched forward unchaining the small boy instantly. To kanda's relief younger teen's chest rose and fell and he had a faint heartbeat. But that would not last for long if he did not get the younger boy to safety.

"Kanda hurry!!" Miranda called gasping as soon as she saw the state Allen was in.

"Allen…" lavi mumbled, glad the boy was alive, a single tear rolled down his cheek.

"C'mon Yu." Three hurried, trying to get back in time to help allen, a dark shadow stood hidden in the trees.

"Take him now exorcists but we will have the destroyer of time…" the voice faded along with the shadow.

* * *

Sai: I am so sorry!! I know a lot of you must hate me for leaving off in a bad spot…oh and Allen learned the word stop!! Gasp

Lavi: Yay Allen's not dead!!

Tyki: yet.

Lavi: holy shit!! When did you get here?!

Tyki: I don't know.

Kanda: idiots.

Sai: um…please review!!

Lavi: yeah please!!


	5. pyscho girl and brotherly love

sai- omg i am soooo sorry that took forever!!!!!

lavi- im sure they will forgive you sai-chan

kanda- che...stupid chick

sai/lavi- hey!!!!

allen- ~watches sai chase kanda~ ...um sai does not own d gray man ....

* * *

allen looked around, it was incredibly cold where ever he was. There was one wall that was a mirror and in the mirror instead of seeing his reflection he saw a tall black figure no features at all.

'_who'_

"im you boy." the figure played a cruel twisted smile.

_'what?'_

"i am you and you are me we are one and the same boy...do you know what we are?"

_'i am an exorcist of the black order and i dont know who you are!'_

"no boy you do know who i am and we are not exorcists we are their enemy the noah"

a small gasp slipped passed his lips.

_'what are you talking about i dont know you! i am certainly not a noah i have the innocence!!_'

Allen lifted is arm showing his arm.

'Yes you do boy but you are the 14th! a noah of the earl."

The black started to fade revealing another allen in the mirror, only this allen had crosses across his forehead and piercing golden eyes.

'I am you and you are me we are one in the same boy!' laughter filled the small room as the noah allen began to reach out of the mirror. Allen stepped back then his whole world went black.

~

* * *

Allen woke up screaming and lashing out at the man who was next to him.

"ALLEN!"

Allen stopped and opened his eyes.

"k-kanda?"

"Yeah jeeze what the hell was that?!"

"k-kandaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" the smaller boy rapped his arms around the older teens waist and wept.

"o-oi whats wrong with you?"

The smaller boy continued to cry while holding the raven haired man by the waist. Kanda sighed and sat next to Allen on the bed as he continued to cry. Once the boy's sobs quieted down Linalee stepped in.

"Allen-san!! your up!" she ran over about to hug him when he slapped her hands away and held on tighter to kanda.

"w-why? why him!" Linalee yelled pointing an acusing finger at kanda which made kanda stare at her.

"hey..." Kanda said in a warning tone to the girl.

"dont hey me Yu Kanda why the hell should Allen pick you?! You were always so cold to him so why you?!" she screeched grabbing allen by the wrist.

"What about me i was so nice to you and you dont even try to remember me!!" she held allen's wrist tighter as the younger boy looked at her fear in his eyes. She began to shake him violently.

"Why Allen Walker?! Why are you so cruel?! Your a horrible person and you deserve no more then the noah!!!!" she yelled which was the last straw for kanda as he slapped her across the face.

She let go of the shaking boy's hand.

"Leave." Kanda said in a very assertive voice.

"b-but-"

"NOW!"

she quickly left the room.

Kanda sighed and looked back at Allen who was curled up on his side his back facing kanda. The raven haired teen could tell that he was shaking, "oi..dont listen to her" Kanda said as he went over to face Allen. Kanda just realised that allen had been mumbling.

'no....n...ah..bet..th..." Kanda leaned in closer to hear him properly.

"im... no b-better than--a noah." Allen mumbled as kanda stared in shock for two reasons one that he has said more then his name and stop and the second that linalee had scared the boy so much.

"No moyashi you are much better then a noah." Kanda spoke softly trying to sooth the boy, but he just kept on mumbling, until Kanda took Allen by the shoulders and made him sit upright.

"Allen Walker you are not a bad person none of this was your fault." He said scowling at himself.

_' I have most definitely become to soft for the moyashi.'_ He concluded this and hugged the boy.

Allen gasped not expecting the cold teen to make physical contact with him. Slowly he lifted his hands up to grasp the cloth of Kanda's shirt s he began to cry again. Pressing his face into kanda's chest, Allen sobbed. Kanda sighed inwardly and just held him closer.

_'Since when do i hug people...and Allen for that matter...oh no...i called him Allen ..not moyashi ....shit.'_

He was barrading himself mentally as he noticed that the sobs became quieter and then stopped all together as Allen's breathing evened out. Kanda was still holding Allen when Lavi walked in and to Kanda's surprise, Lavi didnt make a joke But just smiled softly at the two.

"What the hell are you smiling at baka usagi?" Kanda asked quietly not wanting to wake the younger boy up.

"I knew it."

"Knew what baka?!" Kanda snapped.

"Yu i have one thing to say to you and one thing only-" Lavi walked up to Kanda who was still holding Allen.

"And that is??"

"if you hurt Allen i swear to god you will not see the light of day ever again." Lavi threatened with a straight face and piercing eyes that said he will most definatly carry out his threat.

"I already knew that baka usagi." Lavi smiled at kanda and then looked intently at Allen.

"oh and Yu watch out for Linalee....shes planing something." He spoke as he left the room.

_'Great i have to deal with the noah, akuma and now Linalee.'_ Kanda sighed inwardly again as he softly put Allen back in his bed.

* * *

Allen awoke for the second time that day only to find Kanda missing, and with this he started to panic.

"Oi moyashi i got you food." Kanda spoke as he opened the door with his foot holding three plates of mitarashi dango and about six bowls of ramen and his own soba tempra.

Allen was relieved to see the older teen and he let out a sigh as he looked up and smiled at the older teen.

"Kanda?" Allen asked as he finished his last bowl of ramen in about 10 minutes.

"What?" Kanda asked as he continued to eat.

"kanda?" Allen repeated causing Kanda to look up from his bowl.

"What?" he asked a little annoyed at the repetitions of his name.

Allen leaned over and placed a kiss on Kanda's cheek.

"T-thank Y-y-you." Allen spoke out quietly.

Kanda dropped his chop sticks and stared in shock, then once his brain started working again he turned his head around quickly hiding the faint pink tint on his cheeks. A blush crept across allens face just as Komui walked in with Lavi right behind him. Kanda turned his head back to face the two.

"good news Allen-kun! You can move back into your room tonight instead of staying with Kanda." Komui explained as he looked from Kanda to Allen

Allen's face fell a bit but he nodded none the less, Kanda on the other hand stood up ubruptly.

"No!" Kanda snapped.

"He is not well enough to stay by himself!"

_' Gah listen to me i really have fallen for the baka moyashi.....great.'_

Komui stared in complete shock and the a look of understanding crossed his features.

"Alright Kanda he can stay in your room for a little while but...keep it pg until his wounds heal ok? bye!!" Komui bolted out of the room just as Kanda threw the bowl he was holding at the space where Komui was.

"Yeah Yu keep it pg k?" A murderous intent drifted off of Lavi...._'shit older brother angry...very angry'_

"I wont mess up your little brother baka usagi."

"Good well ciao you two!" The red head left the room leaving the Two alone again.

"Great now i have a psycho Linalee, a killer baka usagi, and the earl to deal with."

* * *

sai- really i am sooo sorry it took me forever and it is really short i have been dealing with midterms and crap...AND I HAVE SOOOOOO MANY TYPOSSS really i will fix them in a while but i just want to let you know that i know they are there .

sooooooooooooooorrrrryyyyy

Allen- please review!

Kanda- che...why do i have to deal with all this shit?!

Lavi - cause you have moyashi - chan!!

Allen- its allen!!!

Sai-.... um anyway im sorry please review!!


	6. pain and plans

sai-chan: Ah I cant believe it is taking me so long to type these Ive been so busy with school and getting money for ohayocon that I haven't had time to write....im a soooo incredibly sorry TT_TT

Kanda- stop babbling and get to the story...

lavi- Yu and Allen sitting in a tree K. I. S. S, I...

Allen/ Kanda- ~punches lavi~

lavi-...ow...

sai.-...um I am soo sorry really and ...i don't own D. Gray-Man

* * *

The next day Allen was released from the hospital and was free to roam around headquarters with Kanda. The smaller teen was able to speak more but sadly his memory remained lost, but this didn't bother the younger exorcist at all. As long as Kanda was with him he didn't care about anything at all.

"oi moyashi...stay away from that girl ok??" Kanda spoke out as they sat in the cafeteria eating.

"..." Allen shuddered as he glanced at the Chinese girl.

"ok...." he replied as he stopped eating.

"im not hungry...." the smaller boy pushed his food away as he turned his head away from Kanda.

"WHAT?!...oi moyashi your always hungry1 whats wrong with you?" he asked completely shocked at the white haired boy.

"im tired..." Allen mumbled as he stood up a stumbled a bit.

Luckily kanda was finished with his food so he grabbed the younger boy before he could fall over. 'great is he sick or something??' kanda silently worried over the boy as he lead him to their room.

Once the two teens got to their room kanda pulled Allen into bed with him, Allen didn't protest as he just curled up next to the raven haired teen. He soon fell asleep with kanda watching him intently.

He was in that room again the one with the piano and the mirror only the copy wasn't in the mirror. Allen turned to his right only to find his copy sitting at the piano.

'welcome back boy.' it grinned a wicked smile.

"what do you want??" Allen became more scared as the copy stood up and approached the teen.

'Its almost time you know?' it spoke in a soft whisper as he approached Allen.

Allen shivered as the person wearing his face came closer. The copy touched Allen's forehead lightly sending a searing pain through Allen's head.

"AAAAAAAHHH!!" Allen fell to the ground clutching his head.

'better get used to that feeling walker, you'll be feeling it a lot more often' the copy laughed cruelly as he backed up into the mirror looking at the teen squirm on the ground clutching his head.

Kanda was startled when Allen suddenly started screaming in his sleep.

"moyashi!" kanda sat up shaking the younger boy by his shoulders.

Allen continued to screech as he clawed at his head.

"moyashi!! moyashi!! damn it ALLEN!!" kanda finally snapped the younger boy out of his slumber.

"K-kanda...." kanda stood up as Allen rolled out of bed and stood on shaking knees.

"oi moyashi....whats wrong?" kanda asked as he approached Allen.

"m-my head...i-it hurts." just as Allen spoke those words his knees buckled causing kanda to catch him before he hit the floor.

"shit"

Komui arrived in the hospital wing as soon as he heard about what happened to Allen.

"what happen?! He was just discharged today!" Komui snapped at the three people in the room clearly worried for the younger boy.

"Yu..." Lavi glared at the raven teen.

"it wasn't me! He stopped eating and said he was tired so I took him up to our room and he instantly fell asleep.!"

"then not too long after he started screaming and then woke up...then he collapsed!" kanda snapped clearly pissed that Lavi dare blame him for what was happening to moyashi.

Lavi looked satisfied as he sat back down.

"i might be able to explain things." a voice from the door was heard revealing none other than.....

* * *

Linalee stood outside the door listening in on the conversation as she smirked at the thought of her former crush in pain.

'_thats what he gets for doing this to me' she walked away..._

_'heheh...ok as soon as visiting hours end I'll sneak into his room....the guard is terrible here.' _she plotted against the boy as she continued to walk down the halls. Just as she was planing to go into her room she felt a hand on her shoulder. She slowly turned to face the person worried that she was caught listening in on the others conversation.

"L-linalee-chan ?" Miranda spoke quietly stuttering a bit.

Linalee sighed in relief.

"yeah?"

Surprised at the cheerful tone the girl had Miranda took a step back.

"Um d-do you know where I can find Komui-San? I need to give him the mission report." the older woman questioned as she looked at the ground. Linalee never knew why Miranda had absolutely no confidence what so ever.

"Um I'm not sure you might want to check the medical wing." she spoke out as a smile played lightly on her lips.

"O-oh thank you." the older exorcist bowed and then walked away pondering how a person can be happy almost all the time.

The Chinese exorcist entered her room and began planning the down fall of the lovable exorcist.

* * *

Sai: once again sooooo sorry its so damn short

Kanda: your pathetic

sai:~sobs~ I knoooooooooooooooow!!!

Allen: ~trys to calm down sai-chan~

Lavi: YU!!

Kanda: what...

Lavi: thats mean!!

Kanda: so?

Allen: pleased review......


	7. crosses to bare

sai: gah I feel so bad I keep updating reeeeeally laaaaaaaaaate!!!!

Allen: uh sai-chan?? u ok??

Kanda: shes drunk...

Lavi: shes happy?

sai: m tiiiiiiiiiired!!! ~giggles~

Allen: uh....~sweat drop~

sai: ~glomps Kanda~

Kanda: GET THE HELL OFF ME........go to sleep dammit

sai: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!! ~slaps Kanda in the face then giggles~

Allen: sai-chan follow me

sai: where we be going??

Allen: to your room ~grabs sai and drags her away~

lavi: uh yeah she doesn't own d gray man.

Kanda: thank god

Kanda turned his head along with the rest of the exorcists in the room.

"I can see my idiot apprentice isn't doing to well" the tall man stepped in and sighed at the sight of his young apprentice.

"General cross!! you never come back to headquarters." komui was truly shocked to see the general standing there.

"Whats wrong with him?" Kanda spoke nearly above a whisper.

"Whats that pretty boy?" cross smirked at the younger teen,

lavi stared, no one was ever able to call Kanda Yu pretty boy without getting his head cut off, no one.

"Whats wrong with him?!" he yelled pushing aside the fact that he was called pretty boy.

"Not sure if I should tell you." cross just continued to smirk.

"God damn you!! Fucking tell me! NOW!!" he snapped standing up.

Cross's smirk faded into a frown, "Boy I will tell you this now, stop loving this child."

Kanda stared, "What?!"

"This boy ,...he was **born **to die. So just stop now or you will be in pain in the near future."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Kanda started to get frustrated.

"Allen walker is doomed to become a Noah" cross spat out in a ice cold tone.

The three men all froze.

'_what?'_

* * *

Linalee gasped, her head lifted from the wood table as a wicked grin spread across her lips.

"_perfect."_

* * *

_'what?`_

Kanda finally found his voice, "What?" his brow knitted together.

"You heard me." the red headed general spoke quietly.

Then in less then 3 seconds Kanda was grabbing the general by the collar of his outfit.

"What?!"

"The boy is going to be a damn Noah! And when that happens I must kill him!!" cross snapped as he pushed the younger boy off of him.

"He's going through the changes now soon his head will start to bleed and the crosses will appear."

Kanda fell to the floor, as lavi stood up, "No way. Thats not possible he has innocence!!"

"Thats what I thought at first too, but I guess it doesn't matter either the Noah side of him will over power the innocence or the innocence itself will kill him. Either way it ends with the boy dieing." cross sat in a chair next to the boys bed.

"your here....to kill Allen?" komui spoke up finally, asking the general.

"yes"

thats when Allen's eyes opened.

* * *

_tap_

_tap_

_tap_

_tap_

_tap_

"Stop tapping your pencil"

"But I'm bored.... how much longer?"

"Not much longer calm down he'll be here soon I promise"

"Dear dear Allen I cant wait to be able to call you brother...Tyki?"

"What?"

"He'll be on our side now?"

A cruel grin spread across his lips.

"Yes road."

* * *

"Ugh...."

"Moyashi!" Kanda was instantly at his side,as he stared down at the younger boy.

Allen looked horrible, his white hair stuck to his forehead, and his skin was as white as paper with dark bag under his large eyes.

"K-Kanda?...where am I?" the younger boy looked around and then spotted the red headed general.

"eep!" Allen hid beneath his covers.

"You...you can say more then my name." Kanda stared at the younger teen in awe.

"Um of course are you sick or something?? uh anyway um master what b-brings you here??" The younger boy peeked out of the covers to glance at Kanda then at cross.

"We will continue this conversation another time boys....Komui wheres the wine??" Cross pulled komui out of the room.

Kanda and Lavi both stared at Allen, not caring if the two just left, finally lavi spoke.

"Allen do you remember what happened this morning?" lavi asked slowly.

"Uh kinda I remember been really tired uh and I remember Kanda ...c-carrying ..m-me." the younger boy blushed furiously.

"So you remember everything even the part when you wouldn't talk to anyone but me and only let me touch you?" Kanda asked as he was hoping the boy did or he would lose his current relationship with the younger boy.

"Y-Yeah....I'm soooo sorry Kanda!" Allen hid once again in his covers.

"Uh I have to go speak with komui" Lavi quickly fled leaving the two alone.

"Oi Moyashi I have to know something..."

"I love you"

Kanda's head snapped up as he looked at the younger boy, Allen's head was down but Kanda could still see the bright red tint that crept across the younger boys face. Allen's hands were balled up into fists as he feared kanda's reaction.

"W-what?'"

"I-I g-guess I always have its just this little um incident made me realize it." he stuttered as he feared Kanda's reply wincing a bit. Just then he felt a soft pair of lips upon his own. Kanda pulled back

"Baka...aishiteru." Kanda mumbled as he sat in the chair next to him.

Allen blushed a deep shade of red as he winced. "o-ow."

"Lay down baka" Kanda gently pushed the younger teen down onto the bed.

"mm...I'm tired..." Allen mumbled as his eyes fluttered closed.

"I will not lose you , Allen." Kanda sighed and watched the sleeping boy then got up and left the room.

* * *

sai: omg I'm being really slow and this is a short one too....don't kill me for cross pleeeeease????

Kanda: ~twitch~

Lavi: how could you sai-Chan!?! making cross kill Allen!!

Allen: what?!

Kanda/lavi/sai: nothing!!

Kanda: review...

sai: please?

Lavi: sai-chan needs some happy comments to keep her moving.


	8. Waaaaay overdue update

Hello everyone I'm sorry it's been so long. I've been going through my old journals and came across this story and decided that I actually want to finish it. I'm going to edit all previous chapters first because my 13 year old self seemed to hate capitalization and puntuation for some strange reason. But after re-reading this I actually like the plot and have some ideas on how to continue the story.


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